by Tammy Phillips
June 30, 2021
“O give me back my health and make me live…You have loved back my life from the pit of corruption and nothingness. For You have cast all my sins behind Your back.” (Is 38:16-17 AMPC)
For most of the last 95 days, every encouragement that I have shared has been to illustrate how the Lord “loved me back to Him” and changed my disgust to mercy from November 30, 2020, through March 1, 2021. God is our Creator. He is our loving Father. He will use everything and everyone to love us back to Him. He will use family, friends, what we see, hear, and read in His word to love us back on the right path. He only wants the very best life for us. He is a good God with a good plan. His plan includes our complete surrender to Him and His way. On the other hand, we have a sneaky enemy whose plans are to steal, kill and destroy us. He will also use anyone and anything to deter and defer. He throws easy, hard, busyness, bitterness, chaos, death, sickness, hurt and offense in our way as obstructions. We have a choice. We can let the obstacles detour us off the road into the pit of nothingness and destruction or we can choose the obstructive path and let God show us how to go around, over or breakthrough every obstacle.
On March 1, 2021, I surrendered my mouth to the Lord which included what went in it and what came out of it. There had been a lot coming out of it and a lot going in it. This is the point where I would love to share with you my great success story. I was successful with the things going into my mouth and my diet for two whole months. I let go of the regret that I had not been disciplined enough to start the weight loss journey earlier, so that I would be at my goal weight for my son’s wedding. I can happily say that I lost 24 pounds and felt great by May 1, 2021. I was on the right path. I had been disciplined in one thing for sure. I had not eaten sweets from August 2020 until April 30, 2021.
My plan was to carefully eat April 29-May 2, during the wedding weekend, without too much restriction and then get back on track. My mistake was bringing the leftover key lime pie bites from the rehearsal dinner back to our cozy beach cottage. I let those little bites bite me and sneak sugar right back into my diet.
Since then, I have been struggling. I have been on a bumpy roller coaster ride with my eating. I would fast three days and I would lose. An event would come up, I would eat and gain. I would lose and then another reason to splurge would come and then I just gained. I broke my own heart, again. BUT GOD! As I was sharing with you my original journey, He loved me back to Him, AGAIN. “I waited patiently and expectantly for the Lord; And He inclined to me and heard my cry. He brought me up out of a horrible pit [of tumult and of destruction], out of the miry clay, And He set my feet upon a rock, steadying my footsteps, and establishing my path.” (Psalm 40:1-2 AMP)
THE STRUGGLE IS REAL. I hate that I made a mis-take, again. I am very competitive. I hate to lose. I hate that I am confessing my sin, instead of my continued success story. However, I want you to know that I am a real person who lives a real life. I am not perfect, but I am complete in Him. Thank God! “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9 KJV). His mercy and lovingkindness are new every morning. Every second and every minute, He loves us. He loved me back to Him. He pulled me out of the pit. He set my upright on the Rock. He steadied my feet and established the way for me, one more time.
I share all this not for your pity. Do not pity me! I made wrong choices, veered off the way and have to suffer the consequences. I have to take responsibility for me. The only reason I share is to encourage you in the Lord and your journey! Life is hard. We all make wrong decisions and do wrong things. I do not care what you have done or have not done. God loves you right where you are! He died for you. The Lord wants every part of you. He forgives you. He forgives me.
I enCOURAGE you to turn to Him! Do you know that repent means turn back and that turn means… again? Come to Him again and again and again. It is ok. He knew we would fall and that is why He sent Jesus. His forgiveness does not give us license to sin but delivers us from it when we do. We want our children to turn to us and to know that no matter what, that they can come to us again and again. We are there for our kids and God is always there for us. He is always in pursuit and always loving us back to Him. Allow Him to lift you up and lead you to your path of breakthrough. I did on June 28, once again. Begin again with Him. Begin again with me.
Hopefully, my honesty will encourage you! And, keep me accountable, Let’s do this.